Just read a blog that was as funny as it was poignant, and no I did not thesaurus that word. He said, and I quote as concerns our beloved (sic) President, "... you have erectile dysfunction, not in your penis, but in your head... because you fail to rise to the occasion..".
(http://samsondelui.blogspot.com/2011/08/mr-president.html)
For my more seasoned readers, you already know that the political class and I are not very fond bedfellows, yes they have repeatedly tried to woo me but to no avail. So let me try write a blog about facts and not lace it with all the hatred I share with my blogmate.(... that does sound awfully gayish.)
First the two most officially powerful men in this country;
THE PRESIDENT
The President of this country has done the following in his life;
1. He is the longest serving politician in Kenyan history representing his constituency since independence. needless to say Othaya is nowhere near the best performing constituencies in this country.
2. He was a powerful Minister in both Moi and Kenyatta governments, amassing wealth political clout and not too much goodwill. Mwai Kibaki has an estimated (most conservatively) wealth of around USD 200M (In contrast, Pres. Obama is worth around 12 M USD).
3. He has consistently made decisions against the interest of the people when the interests thereof come into conflict with his political ones. In 1991 as Vice President and the lead Kikuyu in KANU he dismissed Matiba's claim for multi-partism stating memorably that it was "trying to cut down a mugumo tree with a razor blade." Or in 2005 when he replaced the Boma's draft with a more Kibaki flavored constitution.
4. He also is in power today as the result of a flawed election that was clearly rigged and he held on to that power even while thousands of Kenyans were dying.
5. as of now he is the head of a bloated cabinet that is sinking Billions in chauffeured limousines while Kenyans are dying of hunger, as a pointer; in Greece there are protests in the streets as unemployment soars to the dizzying heights of 17% while in Kenya its not even a concern when it is creaking past 45%!!!
6. When Kibaki came into power Kenya's revenue collection stood at Kshs. 150 Billion, donor aid at low levels of around 60-70 Billion a year. Today, Kibaki is commended for raising that to over 600 Billion shillings, that means government is literally making 5 times more than in 2002!! Yet today we cannot feed our people.
THE RIGHT HON. PRIME MINISTER
1. As his counterpart we saw his love for power exceed his love for human life as walipopigana nyasi....
2. He has not been an MP as long as his counterpart principal but his constituency is one of the worst in the country, with a slum so large it is a tourist attraction.
3. Raila also has made enormous amounts of money through dealings he made in the Moi government as Minister for energy, estimates place it at around Kshs. 4 billion in less than a year. These dealings with infamous Al Bakri group and the Right Hon. Prime Minister are classified as "State Secrets."
4. Although with a much better track record for reform than Kibaki, Raila's is still wanting. Having served in parliament since multi party politics started, he has engineered almost no reform mechanisms. He participated little in the drafting of any constitution although his political clout has enabled him hijack such reforms for political gain when they reached climax, circa 2005, circa 2010.
5.He has also been consistent in his disregard for the common mwananchi, being very much a populist he has made alot of idle gestures but never really did anything o help this country, he has participated in the largesse of this cabinet, even maintaining in his docket, Hon. Charity Ngilu whose indictment for corruption by the KACC was only stopped by the sacking of P.L.O and the disbandment of KACC.
6. More interestingly he has one of the poorest attendance records in parliament even prior to being appointed Prime Minister.
The above are facts, and I will not go into the other henchmen, the Uhurus the Rutos even the Martha Karuas and Mutulas who have questionable records themselves.
I have just this suggestion when considering ANYONE for President in 2012, What is their track record?
In politics?
For reform in their constituency?
Their participation in parliament?
Their personal accumulation of wealth from government positions?
In helping the common mwananchi get a better life?
With these questions... who do you think should take over from these two bastards?
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Sunday, March 27, 2011
HOMOSEXUALITY.. . Society, the Law and some funny ass jokes...
Today is as drab a Monday as can be, I have no hangover, no money, no alcohol, no class... nothing, I am about as bored as any 2o something year old campus student can be; so I do what everyone in this generation does, perk up my lifeless self in front of a desktop and let the wonderful world of the world wide web enthrall me.
So I come across this website http://kenyansagainstgays.wordpress.com/ or is it a blog? Not sure, but as far as controversial Kenyan blogs this sure ranks up top competing aptly with the almost-award winning DIARY OF A KENYAN ATHEIST ahem! Cough! Cough!
It is a whole blog dedicated to the bashing of the homosexual, the articles are unrelentingly and disturbingly anti homo, to almost the point of incitement get these quotes...
"...While the practice itself should be shameful in the extreme, it is worse than scandalous that society allows homosexuals to brazenly talk about such psychotic and psychopathic things as ‘same sex marriage’, ‘gay rights’ and ‘gay tolerance’."
"...Homosexuality is a threat to the very survival of humankind. For in this distorted engagement, ‘serenading’ is the end in itself. Homosexual ‘couples’ argue that they can come round the procreation concern through adoption of children or some laboratory abracadabra. The bottom line is the same. To perpetuate life, you need the combined male and female effort. Homosexuality is hostile to this effort..."
My favorite opinion was obviously this... "The difference between two consenting males on the one hand and a consenting human and a dog on the other hand is academic..." although I have no practical idea how the writer ACTUALLY quoted the opinion of the consenting dog or otherwise.
So far you would probably have formed the opinion that I am a gay-sympathizer, brainwashed by the perverts that pervade the land beyond the Atlantic and Mediterranean (thank God for spell check that is one I would never have had!), fed into believing that two men could possibly share love without condemning the whole country to some very effective falling sulphur and brimstone.
There my friends is where you would be wrong.... NOT.
Some of my friends and enemies is gay, not openly so, they have girlfriends and all but I still think they are gay, I will make fun of them for it... heck when they forget to log out of their facebook pages I will post some nasty update just to piss them off.
Being gay however is not wrong, its nasty for me as fuck, (as I would hetero might be nasty for them.. but I am not sure of that), it is very easy to mock, and I am not sure that's wrong since I make fun of short, stupid and ugly people.. and conversely taller and handsomer people (smarter? than me... ha ha ha you kid..) do the same for me but we don't get to tell people who are different that they are wrong.
And here is where I would love your opinions, what makes homosexuality so wrong? Let me try to make a list of some honest arguments here;
The arguments that I have had the most is that it is against nature? WTF? what is nature? The 'natural' way? then why do we wear clothes, cook food, shave hair, have C-sections and artificial fertilization, condoms, planes, kites, space travel? Human 'nature' if there is such a thing is never defined by biology I would have thunk. Most people do not know that homosexuality has been practiced by human beings for millenia, most people also don't know that thousands of species aside from humans have been observed to continuously practice homosexual behaviors;
http://www.news-medical.net/news/2006/10/23/20718.aspx
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_animals_displaying_homosexual_behavior
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/science-news/5550488/Homosexual-behaviour-widespread-in-animals-according-to-new-study.html
So it would seem that citing homosexuality as unnatural would be intrinsically flawed.
Another argument I have heard is obviously the religious one (whichever religion you would choose most Abrahamic religions have a pretty good answer of falling fire to whichever man wants to stick a penis up his ass...). All this is well and good but at what point would you impose your personal beliefs on other people, how come adultery is a sin and there is no wide condemnation and penal sanctions against that? The Christian should never have the right to dictate his laws to the Muslim, to the Hindu, atheist, native American Indian or for that matter the atheist. If you think Homo is a sin then pray don't gay bash or lie or criminalize some people's private pleasures (he he 'private pleasures').
So I would love to get your opinions on this matter... I was going to copy paste some funny jokes I googled but UoN has cached all sites with the words 'Gay Joke' in them, I wonder why.... Cheerio
P.S a friend helped me out with a joke...
There was this man who walked into a bar and says to the bartender 10 shots of whiskey.
The bartender asks, "What's the matter?"
The man says, "I found out my brother is gay and marrying my best friend."
...
The next day the same man comes in and orders 12 shots of whiskey.
The bartenders asks, "What's wrong this time?"
The man says, "I found out that my son is gay."
The next day the same man comes in the bar and orders 15 shots of whiskey.
Then the bartender asks, "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?"
The man looks up and says, "Apprently my wife does."
So I come across this website http://kenyansagainstgays.wordpress.com/ or is it a blog? Not sure, but as far as controversial Kenyan blogs this sure ranks up top competing aptly with the almost-award winning DIARY OF A KENYAN ATHEIST ahem! Cough! Cough!
It is a whole blog dedicated to the bashing of the homosexual, the articles are unrelentingly and disturbingly anti homo, to almost the point of incitement get these quotes...
"...While the practice itself should be shameful in the extreme, it is worse than scandalous that society allows homosexuals to brazenly talk about such psychotic and psychopathic things as ‘same sex marriage’, ‘gay rights’ and ‘gay tolerance’."
"...Homosexuality is a threat to the very survival of humankind. For in this distorted engagement, ‘serenading’ is the end in itself. Homosexual ‘couples’ argue that they can come round the procreation concern through adoption of children or some laboratory abracadabra. The bottom line is the same. To perpetuate life, you need the combined male and female effort. Homosexuality is hostile to this effort..."
My favorite opinion was obviously this... "The difference between two consenting males on the one hand and a consenting human and a dog on the other hand is academic..." although I have no practical idea how the writer ACTUALLY quoted the opinion of the consenting dog or otherwise.
So far you would probably have formed the opinion that I am a gay-sympathizer, brainwashed by the perverts that pervade the land beyond the Atlantic and Mediterranean (thank God for spell check that is one I would never have had!), fed into believing that two men could possibly share love without condemning the whole country to some very effective falling sulphur and brimstone.
There my friends is where you would be wrong.... NOT.
Some of my friends and enemies is gay, not openly so, they have girlfriends and all but I still think they are gay, I will make fun of them for it... heck when they forget to log out of their facebook pages I will post some nasty update just to piss them off.
Being gay however is not wrong, its nasty for me as fuck, (as I would hetero might be nasty for them.. but I am not sure of that), it is very easy to mock, and I am not sure that's wrong since I make fun of short, stupid and ugly people.. and conversely taller and handsomer people (smarter? than me... ha ha ha you kid..) do the same for me but we don't get to tell people who are different that they are wrong.
And here is where I would love your opinions, what makes homosexuality so wrong? Let me try to make a list of some honest arguments here;
The arguments that I have had the most is that it is against nature? WTF? what is nature? The 'natural' way? then why do we wear clothes, cook food, shave hair, have C-sections and artificial fertilization, condoms, planes, kites, space travel? Human 'nature' if there is such a thing is never defined by biology I would have thunk. Most people do not know that homosexuality has been practiced by human beings for millenia, most people also don't know that thousands of species aside from humans have been observed to continuously practice homosexual behaviors;
http://www.news-medical.net/news/2006/10/23/20718.aspx
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_animals_displaying_homosexual_behavior
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/science-news/5550488/Homosexual-behaviour-widespread-in-animals-according-to-new-study.html
So it would seem that citing homosexuality as unnatural would be intrinsically flawed.
Another argument I have heard is obviously the religious one (whichever religion you would choose most Abrahamic religions have a pretty good answer of falling fire to whichever man wants to stick a penis up his ass...). All this is well and good but at what point would you impose your personal beliefs on other people, how come adultery is a sin and there is no wide condemnation and penal sanctions against that? The Christian should never have the right to dictate his laws to the Muslim, to the Hindu, atheist, native American Indian or for that matter the atheist. If you think Homo is a sin then pray don't gay bash or lie or criminalize some people's private pleasures (he he 'private pleasures').
So I would love to get your opinions on this matter... I was going to copy paste some funny jokes I googled but UoN has cached all sites with the words 'Gay Joke' in them, I wonder why.... Cheerio
P.S a friend helped me out with a joke...
There was this man who walked into a bar and says to the bartender 10 shots of whiskey.
The bartender asks, "What's the matter?"
The man says, "I found out my brother is gay and marrying my best friend."
...
The next day the same man comes in and orders 12 shots of whiskey.
The bartenders asks, "What's wrong this time?"
The man says, "I found out that my son is gay."
The next day the same man comes in the bar and orders 15 shots of whiskey.
Then the bartender asks, "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?"
The man looks up and says, "Apprently my wife does."
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Of Jasmines, Porn and Toppling Dictators
The Jasmine revolution is probably the single most un-gayest time in history that the word jasmine has been used in a phrase.... Come to think of it give me a minute I wiki where the hell the name came from.....
So wiki was no help, they just said ".. journalists dubbed it the jasmine revolution", good thing now I know that I am just as uninformed as the average swimmer of the information super swimming pool, but one thing am pretty sure that the Tunisian 20-something-year-old in the streets, is homophobic enough to not shed blood and be branded Jasmine... but I digress (most abused phrase in the blogosphere).
There are things though we should learn from the Tunisians, Egyptians, Yemen(people? Yemenis? Yemenfolk?), Libyans and any other Arab people who will throw on their Jasmine Kanzus and dispose of their despots.
For one, I have some theories on why and how these revolutions are only occurring in the Arab countries. To put it in a word, LIBIDO. Picture this (men only to read the next few paragraphs), you live in a world where you can see no cleavage no ass and no thighs, where the law forbids a woman to show hair, (not in the good way, its not about waxing boys its about 'bui-buis'),porn is illegal and women have curtains for skirts and their fathers mustached faces as their face-book profile pictures.
Where porn is nowhere to be found and getting a chips funga is punishable by death!... to these people freedom is everything, politics is their club life, without alcohol or sex then the youth are left with nothing but to seek for political bickering.... because as we all know its all about pussy, pombe na wanawake...
So the Jasmine revolution was sparked, when you are on the net all day, without tasty chics to hit on and sleep with on facebook, or porn to watch; what is left but to remove some long standing politician from power...
Ladies and gentlemen I have found the key, if we want to remove Kibaki and Raila from power we should go the Arab way, Mututho is a prophet he saw it first... No alcohol, No sex, No porn, No miniskirts and hipstars.... then the youth of Kenya will rise just as they did in Cairo, Alexandria and Tunis.... because of poverty, disease, graft and an old guard that is clinging to power... AND most importantly because we would have nothing more fun to do.
So wiki was no help, they just said ".. journalists dubbed it the jasmine revolution", good thing now I know that I am just as uninformed as the average swimmer of the information super swimming pool, but one thing am pretty sure that the Tunisian 20-something-year-old in the streets, is homophobic enough to not shed blood and be branded Jasmine... but I digress (most abused phrase in the blogosphere).
There are things though we should learn from the Tunisians, Egyptians, Yemen(people? Yemenis? Yemenfolk?), Libyans and any other Arab people who will throw on their Jasmine Kanzus and dispose of their despots.
For one, I have some theories on why and how these revolutions are only occurring in the Arab countries. To put it in a word, LIBIDO. Picture this (men only to read the next few paragraphs), you live in a world where you can see no cleavage no ass and no thighs, where the law forbids a woman to show hair, (not in the good way, its not about waxing boys its about 'bui-buis'),porn is illegal and women have curtains for skirts and their fathers mustached faces as their face-book profile pictures.
Where porn is nowhere to be found and getting a chips funga is punishable by death!... to these people freedom is everything, politics is their club life, without alcohol or sex then the youth are left with nothing but to seek for political bickering.... because as we all know its all about pussy, pombe na wanawake...
So the Jasmine revolution was sparked, when you are on the net all day, without tasty chics to hit on and sleep with on facebook, or porn to watch; what is left but to remove some long standing politician from power...
Ladies and gentlemen I have found the key, if we want to remove Kibaki and Raila from power we should go the Arab way, Mututho is a prophet he saw it first... No alcohol, No sex, No porn, No miniskirts and hipstars.... then the youth of Kenya will rise just as they did in Cairo, Alexandria and Tunis.... because of poverty, disease, graft and an old guard that is clinging to power... AND most importantly because we would have nothing more fun to do.
Monday, January 3, 2011
BLOGGING
Kenyans, and non Kenyan people-things, how it do? So why is a raven like a writing desk (what I didn't read this book until a few days back)?
Anyway, apparently the other day I got my blog critiqued by a (pseudo?)celebrity, and I wasn't even present at the time. (Note here that the word critiqued might have been used to subtly mean "criticized" but that's just semantics). Apparently there are tactics used by people who can't write so that they can pull off and/or sound like interesting!
Now this comments struck a cord either because said commenter has been my personal idol; and I may or may not have cut away his Nation DN2 (poorest newspaper idea to make a "DN2" by the way) articles and made a mini scrap book, or because I am generally intrinsically self obsessed and can't take criticism.
These tactics include using lists; well come to think of it I have never seen a Carrol, Shaw or Poe list... but ummmmmm... (I will think up an excuse later after breakfast).
people who cant write usually tend to list out their blogs, to probably appeal to the not-so-smartsy clientele, this might explain the numerous number of lists that are found in the lowest rung of literature; self help groups.
Anyway, I have little to say and I had to finish this blog... so cheerio.
Anyway, apparently the other day I got my blog critiqued by a (pseudo?)celebrity, and I wasn't even present at the time. (Note here that the word critiqued might have been used to subtly mean "criticized" but that's just semantics). Apparently there are tactics used by people who can't write so that they can pull off and/or sound like interesting!
Now this comments struck a cord either because said commenter has been my personal idol; and I may or may not have cut away his Nation DN2 (poorest newspaper idea to make a "DN2" by the way) articles and made a mini scrap book, or because I am generally intrinsically self obsessed and can't take criticism.
These tactics include using lists; well come to think of it I have never seen a Carrol, Shaw or Poe list... but ummmmmm... (I will think up an excuse later after breakfast).
people who cant write usually tend to list out their blogs, to probably appeal to the not-so-smartsy clientele, this might explain the numerous number of lists that are found in the lowest rung of literature; self help groups.
Anyway, I have little to say and I had to finish this blog... so cheerio.
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